tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32702455069697276282024-03-05T22:31:50.192-07:00The Rains Came Down. . . thoughts on life and the Mormon faith.SilverRainhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00580230961425635077noreply@blogger.comBlogger467125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3270245506969727628.post-27329714833914804782023-04-02T11:56:00.005-06:002023-04-02T11:56:49.910-06:00The Pain of a Shining LightWhen I began this blog, I really had no idea how much rain could—and would—come down. My experiences with the gospel seem to be different than most. I took the leap of faith and tumbled down the ravine. The things are taught in Church to solve problems didn't work for me. In fact, they made things worse in some cases.It's been a rough few years. My kids have been suffering from the burden ofSilverRainhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00580230961425635077noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3270245506969727628.post-48471262017045035362021-08-31T10:25:00.007-06:002021-08-31T10:30:50.196-06:00Trowels and MusketsI was 17 years old when I first walked into my dorm room at BYU. The last two years had been a struggle. When I was 15 years old, my previous best friend spread rumors about me and her boyfriend to explain why I didn't hang around her any more. Her family didn't often attend church, and I was often the one who drove her to and from youth activities. The last couple of times, she and her boyfriendSilverRainhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00580230961425635077noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3270245506969727628.post-78558530151587643472020-04-10T06:16:00.000-06:002020-04-10T06:23:49.724-06:00Why you can't fast your way into getting what you want....
On the 7th of April, 2020, President Russell M. Nelson joined the Catholics on Good Friday by asking for a worldwide fast to "prayerfully plead for relief from this global pandemic." He also invited anyone not a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints to join.
Since then, people have been going to Facebook to declare "I will follow the prophet!" and with memes like this oneSilverRainhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00580230961425635077noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3270245506969727628.post-72046907725086569972019-08-29T04:00:00.000-06:002020-04-04T18:59:25.392-06:00Child Abuse and the New Training Module
The new training for leadership of youth isn't great, but it's not terrible. A few thoughts I had while taking it:
This is really good:
"Coercion can occur when a leader compels a child using religious language or authority to imply a spiritual obligation or duty, permission, sanction, punishment, justification, intimidation, or threat. This is contrary to the Savior’s teaching that SilverRainhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00580230961425635077noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3270245506969727628.post-32989500529945338632019-08-12T04:00:00.000-06:002019-08-18T09:29:12.142-06:00I, the Samaritan
In many ways, I have been richly blessed in my life.
The Spirit led me to a career that has made it possible to support my children. I have been raised in a faith that has sustained me and given me joy when life has often given me little reason for it.
But I am a Samaritan.
I am divorced and remain unmarried. For a host of reasons, I do not anticipate marrying in the temple again, and SilverRainhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00580230961425635077noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3270245506969727628.post-15442154672254752492019-08-07T06:30:00.000-06:002019-08-07T06:56:29.831-06:00Is "Violence" Really the Right Word?He sat across from me, behind a desk. He was soft-spoken, the quintessential shy guy in the corner. When he asked me that question, "Is 'violence' really the right word? Doesn't that water down the word 'violence'?" I had been trying to explain to him why I—why people like me—so often felt that the church was not for us.
He knew from a previous discussion I had with him that I had been SilverRainhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00580230961425635077noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3270245506969727628.post-2603378098225847642019-07-07T10:29:00.001-06:002019-08-18T09:28:43.485-06:00When Charity Causes DeathHave you ever felt that you fail at doing the right thing? Maybe you have tried to be a good spouse, but find yourself always falling short. Maybe you have a coworker who doesn't seem to like you, no matter what you do to mend fences. Maybe you have a child who has chosen to reject your beliefs, and you feel like you have failed them. Or maybe you find yourself battling a destructive habit, only SilverRainhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00580230961425635077noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3270245506969727628.post-44734168980175933682019-01-14T07:00:00.000-07:002019-01-14T08:50:46.905-07:00Changes in the Church: Separating the Wheat from the Tares
Sistas in Zion posted this to their Facebook page not long ago. It is a sentiment that I am finding expressed more and more often in the whirlwind of changes in the Church. This idea that the changes in the church will prove those who are truly the Church of God and those who are not.
Those who follow the prophet, do what he says, are those who will be proved faithful, and those who do not SilverRainhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00580230961425635077noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3270245506969727628.post-10195517264667176722018-10-04T10:30:00.000-06:002018-10-04T10:39:20.507-06:00Living with both fear and faith....I lived in an almost constant state of fear for years. October is a hard month for me, not only because it was one of the incidents that I experienced, (I am reminded every time I see a fog machine,) but because it is National Domestic Violence month.
Every year, I consider wearing purple on the day of the month that he left me. I only did it once. A tiny, purple ribbon. The truth is, I don't SilverRainhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00580230961425635077noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3270245506969727628.post-2741805374973923372018-08-21T06:00:00.000-06:002019-08-18T09:31:25.510-06:00Where Culture and Doctrine Collide—The Cult of Positivity
"There is a truth deep down inside of you that has been waiting for you to discover it, and that truth is this: you deserve all good things life has to offer."
—The Secret
"Yea, blessed are they whose feet stand upon the land of Zion, who have obeyed my gospel; for they shall receive for their reward the good things of the earth,...And they shall also be crowned with blessings from above..SilverRainhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00580230961425635077noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3270245506969727628.post-5526987235208169832018-07-08T14:25:00.001-06:002018-07-08T14:26:15.697-06:00Ministry and Suffering Alone
There is a rising trend of people talking about reaching out to those who are struggling. I'm not sure how I feel about that. While I don't think that reaching out is wrong, there's something about this effort that doesn't sit well with me.
It started with the new ministering program. I absolutely love the idea of ministering. I've struggled with the visiting teaching program for years. At SilverRainhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00580230961425635077noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3270245506969727628.post-38101553199606282972018-07-05T08:30:00.000-06:002018-07-05T08:33:52.162-06:00A Hunger and a ThirstThis is a difficult topic to discuss, because it's offensive. I guarantee that someone is going to claim that what I'm saying is Pharisaical, that I'm saying I'm more righteous than they are. But I'm not. I have some very definite sins that I'm struggling with which keep me separated from God.
But despite this, an observation has been weighing on my mind. This is my attempt to explore what I'm SilverRainhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00580230961425635077noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3270245506969727628.post-48567052256995648382018-05-18T19:28:00.002-06:002018-05-18T19:28:48.428-06:00This, Not That (Or, what to say to people who are grieving.)Just some thoughts to help people who don't know how to help or what to do:
Not ThatSay This
Variations:"It will be okay in the end/the next life."
"I know that, despite what you're going through, God really loves you and is pleased that you are still fighting even though things aren't ideal right now."
Why: The next life is utterly irrelevant to current grief. We were sent here to this lifeSilverRainhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00580230961425635077noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3270245506969727628.post-38210841447411439522018-04-03T10:15:00.002-06:002018-04-03T10:16:14.576-06:00"That they might have joy."
I've been thinking a lot about the idea of "forced joy," or (much like Elder Uchtdorf's talk in fall 2017) the idea that we can be joyful in spite of circumstances.
It's something I'm really struggling with. I can pretend to be happy. It's not hard. I can spare everyone around me the struggles that I'm facing. But the more I try to pretend I'm not facing them, the more they weigh on me. The SilverRainhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00580230961425635077noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3270245506969727628.post-5842269898832265872018-02-26T07:00:00.000-07:002018-05-18T19:11:09.352-06:00The Pride of My Heart: Doing it MyselfAnd so great were their afflictions that every soul had cause to mourn; and they believed that it was the judgments of God sent upon them because of their wickedness and their abominations; therefore they were awakened to a remembrance of their duty. —Alma 4
There are so many things about recovering from a divorce you once swore you would never allow to happen, and subsequently coparentingSilverRainhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00580230961425635077noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3270245506969727628.post-26845890784120455132017-03-27T08:00:00.000-06:002017-03-27T08:32:23.940-06:00Tale as Old as TimeThis isn't exactly a review. I wasn't terribly impressed with the live-action Beauty and the Beast. It was okay. A little more backstory, sure, but nothing like the Cinderella remake.
Beauty and the Beast used to be my very favorite movie. A heroine who loved to read and had her own horse? I was hooked. I loved idea of learning to love, rather than falling in love.
But I saw Belle's and the SilverRainhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00580230961425635077noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3270245506969727628.post-59025301286468674512017-02-17T09:00:00.000-07:002017-02-17T09:25:07.943-07:00"You have no power over me!"
When I was in kindergarten, I used to go to the principal’s office to read TIME magazine to him. Occasionally, he would ask me what a specific word meant. I remember being worried I wouldn’t explain it correctly, that I would be wrong. That summer, I spent weeks wrestling with math, sometimes literally banging my head on the desk in order to catch up enough to enter 2nd grade.
My mom was an SilverRainhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00580230961425635077noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3270245506969727628.post-59465686569325228472016-09-12T08:00:00.000-06:002016-09-12T09:55:09.835-06:00The Non-prodigal OneI have not written in some time, since I have been under considerable stress in my personal life. I don't write much when I'm in the middle of my own crises. I have no energy for it, nor do I feel I have anything to offer. But recently, a thought did occur to me which I felt I ought to share.
One of the many things which has troubled me lately was the cry of the non-prodigal son, the one who SilverRainhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00580230961425635077noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3270245506969727628.post-24367012113301196952016-06-28T11:55:00.000-06:002016-06-28T11:56:19.081-06:00That Which is of Most Value"Fear ye not therefore, ye are of more value than many sparrows.Matthew 10:30
I have been thinking long and hard about the war of ideologies we are in. On both sides, people are fighting so hard to prove themselves right, especially on the internet. We talk about principles and doctrines, but we rarely talk about individuals.
In his talk, "The Worth of Souls is Great!" Elder Paul H. Dunn makes SilverRainhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00580230961425635077noreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3270245506969727628.post-14837544370088592832016-06-21T07:00:00.000-06:002016-06-21T07:00:21.611-06:00So Simple a Call"Which now of these three, thinkest thou, was neighbour unto him that fell among the thieves? And he said, He that shewed mercy on him. Then said Jesus unto him, Go, and do thou likewise."Luke 10:36-37
If there is anything at the core of the Gospel, it is this commandment: to go and show mercy on our brothers and sisters. The Atonement itself was necessary, not only to redeem us, but to show SilverRainhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00580230961425635077noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3270245506969727628.post-84141797933048759092016-06-14T07:00:00.000-06:002016-06-14T08:05:55.821-06:00Hands of GodMany years ago, I prayed for charity. I knew what I was doing when I did it, but I did it anyways. Now, years later, I still don't feel like I'm very good at it.
I don't do any great service. I don't even do my visiting teaching as I would like to.
The talk by Rex D. Pinegar is the shortest in the set for this week's session in the General Conference Odyssey. But it is the one that resonated SilverRainhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00580230961425635077noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3270245506969727628.post-90239642731148058632016-06-07T07:00:00.000-06:002016-06-07T12:15:42.073-06:00Divorce, Pornography, Turner, Persky, and Being a Mormon Woman
First a disclaimer. In light of the last post and this one, one might think I'm struggling deeply right now. Strangely, I'm not. I could never write these posts if I were. These are not fresh wounds, they are old scars, which means I can poke at them a little, feel the pain just enough to describe it. Sure, things that happened recently have pulled at the scars, but I'm fine.I promise, dear SilverRainhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00580230961425635077noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3270245506969727628.post-49435817505969204702016-05-31T07:30:00.000-06:002016-06-02T08:41:35.338-06:00Rejected and DespisedAnother single man I knew and liked just got engaged. He is responsible, attractive in both personality and looks. He takes the Church seriously, and truly cares about God. And he wasn’t interested in me, even a little. He is only the latest in a long line of engaged people I've seen marry over the years since I divorced. At this point, every LDS male I’ve ever dated or been interested in is SilverRainhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00580230961425635077noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3270245506969727628.post-86081792557717336972016-05-24T08:00:00.000-06:002016-05-24T08:00:02.430-06:00"Thy Will On Earth"In my personal life, I have had opportunities to ponder what it means to be a member of this Church. As I watch people with experiences like mine churn against the practices and doctrines of the Church, I wonder if it is only a matter of time before I, too, fall away. Insight into why I can't seem to give up has come slowly and piecemeal. I'm not sure there is one large answer. All I know, is SilverRainhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00580230961425635077noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3270245506969727628.post-569772710327683932016-05-10T10:00:00.000-06:002016-05-10T10:24:29.083-06:00A Friend to HateThere is a meme that gains in popularity daily. It teaches that judgment, pain, and discomfort are bad. Tolerance, permissiveness, and acceptance are good. If we love someone, it says, we should never judge them. We should never hurt them. We should never make them uncomfortable or make them question what makes them happy. Tolerating their differences is required, celebrating them is ideal. SilverRainhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00580230961425635077noreply@blogger.com2