If There Were a God

"If there were a God, there would not be so much suffering." "If there were a God, He would show Himself to me." "If there were a God . . . ." These phrases echo through the history of mankind, sometimes getting louder and more commonly uttered. I find it interesting to note that most of the time, those who feel this way do so in reaction to some perceived injustice.

As I have observed and lived the way the Father deals with me, guiding me carefully through slowly increasing paths of knowledge, I have gained a deep trust in Him and in my Savior. I do not know them as well as I wish, but I know them well enough to trust them. God has said that His entire purpose is to bring us eternal life. There is nothing greater! Although I do not understand all that this entails, I trust Him that it is glorious and wonderful beyond all imaginings. I don't worry about what exactly the Celestial Kingdom will consist of, because I know that if I humble myself to accept in gratitude the offer made to me, I will bask in it, whatever it may be. If I work, I will work in the glory of God and it will be beautiful. If I sing His praises in the choirs of heaven, it will be because my soul cannot contain my joy and gratitude. If I am married to one or to many, it will be in the spirit of perfect love and perfect communion. All that matters to me is to be with Him again, and to help as many of my brothers and sisters enjoy the same.

I am willing to trust Him in how to bring me to Him. If He says I must be baptized to apply forgiveness of Adam's sin, I will do so. If He says I must humble myself and love those I would rather avoid, I will put every effort into doing so. If He says I do not need to hold the Priesthood or anything like it now, than I will serve in the way He has asked me to. If He says I must be patient and allow Him to run His Church through men who also yearn to be with Him, that is fine by me. I have chosen to subdue my will under His will. If I am to be labeled a blind follower, than so be it. All that matters to me is how He feels about me.

I trust Him to guide me in the paths which I most need to follow. I have felt His strength pushing me down paths I would rather not have taken. I have felt His love help me be joyful in walking these paths. I do not need to listen to the "wisdom" of others who rail against the Church and her current doctrines. I feel no need to second guess the Lord.

I trust His ability to work through imperfect vessels, male and female, to bring about perfect purposes because I have felt Him work through me. What utter joy! I wish with all my power that I could share with others what lies down the path of discipleship and beyond the veil of uncertainty, pride and confidence in one's own intelligence. All must find that path in their own way. So, I am left with nothing but pleading and testimony. There is nothing in the philosophies of (wo)man that can compare! Find it. Go just a little further than you think you can. Try just a little harder to trust God. He is there, and He loves.

In the end, I know that if there were a God, He would know better than I what His children need.