Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Valentines Day for Singles

Last year, Valentine's Day was nearly one week after I had been attacked by my spouse. Although, by this time, I had begun to recover (speaking of emotionally, as I had no physical wounds), I was still having bouts of uncontrollable trembling. I suppose that on some level, I knew that the worst was still ahead of me. Needless to say, I had things on my mind besides valentines.

Now, almost a year later, the fear comes less often, and I find myself wanting to reach out and tell the people I care about how much they have meant to me in this past year, especially since many of them are also single. I think that, perhaps, it has taken a deep betrayal of love for me to treasure genuine love and caring, and know how to genuinely love and care.

I imagine this is what is meant when the Lord teaches that by tasting bitterness, we learn to prize what is sweet and good. After some time suffering outside of the Garden of Eden, Adam and Eve rejoice, saying, "Were it not for our transgression we never should have . . . known good and evil, and the joy of our redemption, and the eternal life which God giveth unto all the obedient." I think I understand a little more how they felt.

Although I was never a fan of Valentine's Day (I still strongly dislike pink), this year it has caused me to reflect on love, and how real love almost always comes bittersweet, through sacrifice. I hope that I will be better able to "comfort those that stand in need of comfort . . . " as a better disciple of He who indelibly demonstrated love, and that I can "bind up the brokenhearted" and bring healing into the lives of those who need the Savior, the way I have been comforted and healed.

And someday, I hope that if I ever have a chance to love a spouse again, that I will be wise because of my experience, and choose to love someone who understands love.

Even if that means he has also learned by experience.

1 comment :

  1. I'm sorry that the last year, and even before, has held so much pain. It is a testimony of the power of healing through the atonement that you are opening your heart to those who show you true love. "Continue ye in my love."

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