Female Ordination and the Church: Another Way

I am one who has struggled mightily with female roles in the Church and in eternity, yet I have a VERY hard time being sympathetic to Ordain Women as a movement. Most individuals who have aligned themselves with that group, I sympathize and even empathize with. I have gone to the mattresses on many of those same issues many times. I am not known for my reticence in speaking up.

There is nothing new about Ordain Women. They have organized together in direct, open, and unapologetic opposition to the Church. I'm not going to pick apart their claims to faithfulness and belief in priesthood authority while publicly opposing that authority. There is really no need, it's obvious enough. I also have no doubt that there are well-meaning people caught up in the smoke and mirrors. But I personally don't have a very long rope when it comes to that brand of deception, conscious or not. I'm all too well acquainted with it.

Daughters in my Kingdom III, the War Chapters

When I began to write about this book, it was with the hope and expectation that my predictions about it would be wrong, that my perspective would change from it. I have found it surprisingly difficult to read and to write, and the chapters about the war have been the hardest so far.

About the time I began to read about war in Daughters in my Kingdom, I began a book called Behind the Iron Curtain: Recollections of Latter-Day Saints in East Germany. This is a subject near to my heart because, no matter that I was born in America, and grew up in America, my soul lives in Germany. I don't tell people this when they ask me where I am from, because it requires too much explanation, but Germany is where I consider myself home.

The German people are stoic, with dry senses of humor. They are friendly, but private, only letting select people into their lives. More than anything, they have an inner strength mixed with a willingness to sacrifice that is unparalleled. They are rooted deeply in reality, and have learned to find beauty and humor in the harshness that life can bring. Their stories of the war can't help but betray this tender-hearted, unflinching nature.

It is this same spirit which permeates the accounts of women during the World Wars.

"Daughters in My Kingdom" Post, the Second

Either I am particularly raw right now, or this book just seems to rub a raw spot on my soul. I don't cry often when reading anything, but when I read the story of how one woman's baby died, it hit me hard. I know the fear of losing my children. Particularly poignant was reading how, after she lost her baby, she used her knowledge of the pain to comfort and mourn with others who lost theirs!

This is personal to me. I know that the things I have experienced are a drop in the bucket compared to the suffering one human can endure. And yet, like a sock full of nearly invisible holes, I feel myself unraveling, the holes getting bigger no matter how I try to patch them. Lately has been one of those times, when I yearn for help to hold myself together and do not know where to find it. My tank is empty, and I am running on fumes and faith.

"Daughters in My Kingdom" Post, the First

I am trying very hard to read this book with an open mind. It is difficult, because I had an extremely hard time with the Young Women's program and my antipathy has more or less translated to Relief Society. I begin to read the book with two expected possible paths before me. Either I will love the book and be frustrated that the real world is so far from it and I don't know how to change it, or I will be frustrated that what the book describes is hopelessly fluffy and unrealistic. However, I am reading it with faith that there may be a path I haven't yet seen, and trying to pick out whatever good I can. I am also reading it slowly, to make sure I don't miss anything.

So far, I have two impressions that I would like to share.

10 Things a Believing Feminist Can Contribute

I wrote this back in July as a response to another post somewhere that I can't now remember. I didn't post it then, because I felt it was too contentious. Now that the embers of that has died, I went back and read it and realized that there is a lot worthwhile in this beyond simple rebuttal. It contains useful perspective I have gathered in my not-always-peaceful years in the Church.

1. Make smart, insightful, and charitable comments in SS and RS.

2. Volunteer to teach lessons and give them an empowering, subtly faithful twist. (quote church leaders as much as possible and use examples of great people throughout.)

3. Be charitable when something offensive is done. Remember that when you have a lot of toes to step on, your feet will probably be crushed unknowingly. Discuss your concerns with leaders or those responsible. Don't take it upon oneself to change another person's work without their knowledge.

4. When something offensive is said or done in lessons and talks, pray for the Lord to soften your heart and grant you His Spirit and then address either the speaker or RS president and voice your concerns, with the intent to come to a greater understanding between you and the speaker. Chances are people have been offended by you, and you never knew.

5. Be open about who you are. If you are a working mom and loving it, be open about that and talk about why that works for you. Mention it in discussions where appropriate. Rejoice in similar comments from others, even those who stay home to raise their children and love their choice. Be certain to share other aspects of your heart which might help you and others come closer in the worship of Christ. Be willing to support sisters who may need a break from their children to take a class, go to lunch or date their husband, even though your time is limited. Be willing to accept the same help from them.

6. Write. Blog. Learn how other smart people are shining the Light of Christ and contributing in a positive and loving way.

7. Start a book group with all other women in your ward. Discuss issues which concern you. Gain others' opinions on topics and increase your own consciousness of other perspectives, as well as sharing your own. Read and discuss articles of all sorts, particularly those which deal with issues you might have.

8. Tell people about places they can go to share their perspective and gain others' perspective as well. A lot of women have concerns but don't know how to learn about them. Make yourself and your home a safe place for discussion of all aspects of discipleship.

9. Volunteer a lot in your ward. If you build up credibility as a generous giving person, people will give you the benefit of the doubt when you speak up in RS in a thoughtful way.

10. Don’t be afraid to do things a little untraditionally. If you are uncertain about the propriety of an action, counsel with your bishop or other priesthood leader before making a decision. Obedience and humility walk hand in hand with learning and progression.